hoov15

Back from house-sitting. I made some decent money that I'm sure will be spent before I can even blink. I've got a book to buy, a birthday present to buy, and the usual moving back in stuff. Gotta eat and survive. I'm not entirely certain if I'm getting paid for training, which starts much sooner than I thought (roughly 22 days.) I don't have all that much preparing to do to get ready for any of this, at least in the physical realm. I'm basically still packed from leaving school so that's done. All my presentations are done. I'm signed up for classes and everything seems to be in order, save for a few odds and ends.

Am I mentally prepared? I'm not so sure. It's a big change. Nothing is going to be the same as it was moving in for the past 4 years. My studies change, my job changes, my standing changes. I feel like I'm either making too big a deal of it or I'm not taking it seriously enough. There's no real way to tell, right? 1) Because I've never worked in this office ever, let alone been a graduate assistant and 2)Because I'm not sure my office even knows what they expect of me because my job is new and they're still working out the kinks. We're all kind of gonna play it by ear, and I was never that good of a sight-reader.

I'm still being as chill as possible around this house. Fun things might happen this weekend. The fair maybe. Salem baseball maybe. Lynchburg to see Justin for his birthday maybe. These things should be fun. On Tuesday night me and Jamie are going to nerd it up at the midnight showing of Harry Potter 6. I'm re-reading the last book right now. I don't know if it's because it's been so long since I've read it, but I don't remember half the shit that happens in that book. We watched the first movie today. They were so little. I was 12 when I got the first book. Wow. I.Am.Old.

5:45am - Dog wakes me up by licking my face
5:50am - Take dog on walk. Dog eats plants. Dog almost gets us both hit by a car.
6:00am - Feed dog, two outside cats, and inside cat(blind)
6:05am - Blind cat trips me and we both go tumbling down the stairs.
6:30am - Go back to sleep, get tangled in iPod cord
8:45am - Dog walks to sliding glass door and violently barks at nothing for 20 minutes. Wakes me up.
9:00am - Blind cat steals iPod and hides it.
9:05am - Find iPod, laugh at blind cat
9:10am - Go back to sleep.
12:00pm - Dog wakes me up by licking my face
12:10pm - Walk dog.
12:20pm - Play Farmtown on Facebook.
12:45pm - Miss Boyfriend
1:00pm - Drive to Moneta to take care of two different cats and bunny
1:15pm - Bond with buny
1:45pm - Drive back to Stewartsville
2:00pm - Miss Boyfriend
2:30pm - Have Marley and Me moment with Dog
3:00pm - Shower in awesome bathroom with double showerheads
3:45pm - Go home and eat
5:00pm - Walk dog, see other dogs, almost die
5:20pm - Feed dog, outside cats and blind cat (blind cat nestles leg)
6:00pm - Sit in hammock chair and read (in said book the main character has a 4-page long conversation with his dick)
6:20pm - Laugh forever about main character having a conversation with his dick
7:40pm - Get out of hammock chair, covered 4700 in bug bites
8:00pm - Miss Boyfriend and play around on Facebook
9:30pm - Watch trashy reality TV
10:01pm - Talk to boyfriend on phone
10:10pm - Outside cat gives me a puncture wound
11:05pm - Walk dog
11:30pm - Eat lunchable
11:50pm - Watch trashy reality TV
2:00am - Finally fall asleep only to rinse and repeat

I signed up for my grad classes today. I spoke to my advisor on the phone and he seems awesome. I've been pretty blessed thus far with awesome advisors at LC. Cliff Potter was the shit. Any man that tells me if I have any problems that all I have to do is call him and he'll "take care of it," is good on my list. Mark was obviously a great advisor to me as I am pursuing even further education and not Area Manager at McDonalds. I wonder what he'd think of me sticking around LC for another two years. We'd so drink together. Dr. Roux was a great advisor and very gracious to take me on after Mark passed. He got a lot of advisees dumped on him and he still managed to remember everyone's name. He really pushed me to get out of Lynchburg and one day I just might. Now I have Dr. Jones. He knew the entire course offering list off the top of his head and he's already talking about working certain courses around in my second year to fit what I'm looking for, independent studies, etc.

For the first semester, my schedule is:

Mon - class i dont remember the name of 4:30 - 7:00pm
class i dont remember the name of 7:00 - 9:00pm
Thur class i dont remember the name of 7:00 - 9:00pm

Yeah. Welcome to grad school. I wonder how feasible it is to miss a class. Because I'm seeing U2 on Oct 1st and that's a Thursday. I have class Thursday nights. Yeah...I won't be there, sorry.

I feel better now that I have all my classes squared away and I have an idea of where I'm living. My presentations are done and all I need to do now is purchase books when they tell me what books I need. It seems to be falling into place a little too smoothly. I'm trying to channel my inner optimist and just accept things being awesome as opposed to wondering when it's all gonna hit the fan. I know that HD/AHD and RA training will be draining and challenging (and hopefully fun,) and I know that classes will be way more challenging than my undergrad classes. I really wanna get started though, I'm pretty excited about all of it because it's the same old place with the people I know and love but it's all going to be different and new. Yay, there's that inner optimist.

I'm house sitting this week. I start today and the family comes back next Sunday. It's a pretty sweet gig, not gonna lie. I have to stay here though..by myself. It's a smidge creepy. The house is very nice though. I won't go into too much boring detail, but it's nice. I have to feed their animals twice a day and take their huge dog out three times a day. He's staring at me. He's been staring at me since I got here. He's looking at me like I'm not supposed to be here and as far as he's concerned, I'm not. Even though I met him a week ago and he seemed cool with me then. He seemed cool with me when I took him for a walk earlier. But now he's staring at me and he won't stop. I'm not that interesting. I know he's just trying to figure me out. I'm pretty easy to figure out. We'll be friends by the end of the week, no doubt.

I think I'm going to start a business. This really is the life. I'm pretty much getting paid to sit on my ass for a week. The only duties I have are make sure the animals don't die and pick up the mail and newspaper every morning. The other duties that aren't included in the job description but are pretty much implied are as follows:

1.Sit on your ass
2.Eat food that you didn't buy
3.Play FarmTown on Facebook.
4.Catch up on re-reading Harry Potter 6 and 7

ALL MY DREAMS HAVE COME TRUE! All my life I've been looking for a way to get paid to do nothing and avoid options such as welfare and unemployment. It's happening now. Therefore, I'm starting a business. It will be a house-sitting business. Do you need someone to make sure your animals don't die and nobody steals your shit while you're on vacation? Want to pay that person to make that happen for you and eat all your food and watch your TV and use your internets? Call me. I'll do it. I'm clean if I'm in a space that's not my own. I'm house trained. I won't disturb your neighbors. See? It's a win-win for all of us.

Now there are productive things I could be doing while I'm here. For instance I have a training presentation that I need to finish and send in before Monday. I can do that. I could do push-ups for christ's sake, I don't know. I'm sure there are productive activities just waiting for my undivided attention. And I might get to them. Just maybe.

Now...on to do nothing. I'm gonna do nothing and I'm gonna do it hard.

Ok, I feel compelled to post about this.

First, let's set up a few pointers. This post about Michael Jackson does not mean that I don't care about Ed or Farrah. I think they were both important cultural icons. And I'm not blaming this on the fact that there is a generation gap and that I'm "too young" to care much about those two. I recognize their significance and the significance of their deaths. They are just as sad. I just don't have as many memories or worthwhile things to say. Is that horrible? I don't think so, because I don't know any of these people.

Having said that, here goes.

I got a little choked up about MJ today. Lauren called me to tell me that he'd had a heart attack. Not a half hour later she called me to tell me he'd passed. I can't believe it, I really am shocked. I'm not beside myself or anything, but I am shocked. It's like he's always been there. I know that's awe inspiring and all. It's kind of like Elvis has been dead my whole life. That's how I saw him. A great musical icon, that had passed before I was born. Well Michael has been that great musical icon that's been there my entire life and I guess I thought it would always be that way. I never spent too much time thinking about him. Yeah he went through the crazyness, the man was not well (and I don't just mean in the end, I don't think he's been well since he entered the business as a child.) The crazyness doesn't change how I feel about his music. Sometimes I can separate the man from the music and sometimes I can't. It depends on the situation I guess. In most cases I think that without the man, there'd be no music and the flip side as well. I choose not to separate the two. With MJ I've been able to separate I guess and I'm not sure why.

I remember seeing his videos on MTV when they were new. Not a tribute or an anniversary of the release of Thriller or anything.

I remember we had this video of Alvin and the Chipmunks when I was a kid. I'm not sure what it was for, but I remember that Will Smith hosted it and Alvin went through all these different decades of music. That little chipmunk danced side by side with MJ in the Smooth Criminal video, the Beat It video and I think Black or White but I don't remember exactly.

I know that Thriller is one of the albums that my mother had on vinyl when I'd sift through her old records.

I remember the Black or White video like the back of my hand. I remember being really creeped out about the people's faces shifting into other faces at the end of the video.

I remember the Madison Square Garden TV special. I watched that thing over and over again. I was trying to study him. How he moved, how his movements changed in the old videos I'd seen and that particular stage show. I wanted to see if I could figure out even a little bit how he ticked.

I remember singing Heal the World in elementary school.

We listened to Thriller every Halloween.

I remember learning the dance to Beat It (and I still know it, that shit stays with you.)

I remember singing Scream at the top of my lungs with my crazy freshman roommate in college.

The things that I remember about Michael Jackson span, literally, my entire life. It's difficult for me to wrap my head around. I'm not devestated. I'm not holding any memorial services. I'm sad yeah, but it's not leaving me a mess. It's just bizarre. I think that I'm going to remember all of those random things instead of focusing on the molestation charges and the baby dangling and the im black but im white but im not things. It's not that those things weren't significant in his life, they just have nothing to do with the reason why I liked MJ. I dig his music. That's what I'm choosing to focus on. And for the rest of the evening I will listen to my little collection of his stuff. I really like 'You Are Not Alone,' 'Remember the Time,' 'Smooth Criminal,' and 'Wanna Be Startin Somethin.' I always hated PYT and You Rock My World.

I guess I felt compelled to write all that because this is one of those "I'm going to remember where I was when I heard it," type of things. No matter what you think of the guy, I definitely think that people are going to miss what his influence represented, even if they don't actually miss him. I guess that's what happens when the world turns you into an icon.

blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh

I've been in this house for too long. I get up in the morning, I clean the house. We watch TV. I clean some more. We watch some more TV. Ginny comes home for her afternoon break. She leaves. We watch TV. Mom comes home from work. We have dinner and watch TV. I come putz around on the internet. I go to bed.

THAT'S MY DAY! EVERYDAY! Now I know what you're thinking. "Get a job!" Yeah, I know. I know that when I have a job I complain that all I wanna do is sit around the house and do nothing. Now that I have the opportunity to sit around and do nothing, I want to do things. It's never enough, is it? I mean, if I still had friends from H.S. then this wouldn't be such an issue, but I don't. I'm not entirely sure why, but we all seemed to grow apart. It's not necessarily a bad thing. People grow apart and move on, that's what they do. But it leaves me in a very boring place while I'm at home. Don't get me wrong. I love my family and some of my best stories are from crazy things that my family does when we're together. It's great. But I'm bored. I'm very very bored and I can't afford to drive to Lynchburg very often to see the friends that I have there. And even if I did, I can't just show up uninvited. Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez.

I need some excitement. Even small excitement. A tiny little adventure. That would be nice. I'm just getting bored and complacent.

I'm going to start house-sitting for a woman I barely know on Saturday. She's the mother of one of Jamie's friends from high school. They've got a really nice house. They're going to be gone for a week and they're going to be pay me to sit on my ass, live in their house, and walk their dog for a week. It's the American dream, to be paid to do nothing. I'm sort of excited about it. I'm also a little apprehensive, because I don't know these people and I'm just gonna shack up in their house and do nothing for a week. I'm going to start a business. So if you live in the Roanoke/Lynchburg area and you want to go on vacation, call me. I'll sit in your house and eat your food and make sure your animals don't die. You can then, in turn, pay me. Sounds good, right? I think so.

Ugh...I need excitement. If anyone can think of some excitement, send it my way.

I got in a fight with my ceiling fan this morning. I haven't had this fan very long, maybe a week or less. I was changing my shirt. I was going to put a tank top on so I could go outside and mow the grass. I didn't want a t-shirt tan line. So I took my shirt off. Put my hands over my head and the fan sliced me. I have two cuts on my pinky finger. That doesn't sound too bad, but they are kinda deep cuts and it still hurts. This happened like 3 hours ago. No bueno.

I had an excellent weekend, in other news. We spent Saturday and Sunday in Lynchburg. It's father's day and dad's birthday weekend so the fam got together for a various list of weekend events. Dad and my sister's boyfriend Seth were extras in a movie about the Civil War. They played Union soldiers. Ew. But it was cool. There are some decent pictures up on Facebook. I met Justin's parents for real and had dinner with them. It was...interesting. I just found it a little odd that they didn't want to know anything about me. Didn't ask me one question. But I was polite and I didn't curse or do anything inappropriate. I was proud of myself. We watched 7 Pounds which was a decent movie. The first half of it was SO SLOW. I kind of feel like a fraud for being emotionally invested in the 2nd half of the movie because I was so bored and distracted during the 1st half. We then hit up the Hillcats game along with probably around half of the city of Lynchburg. The Hillcats lost miserably. There were little kids screaming for fly balls, an old biker dude smoking Reds in front of me, and fireworks. Pretty decent fireworks actually.

Sunday was pretty chill...for the most part. There was a Bill Murray marathon on and I ate an entire Quarter Pounder with cheese. We went swimming. For those of you that know absolutely nothing about me, I can't swim. Not a lick. I can't tread water or really even float very well. I kind of hang out in the water that I can stand in and splash people. This apparently wasn't good enough for Lorie, Seth, Ginny and Justin. They wanted to teach me. And I mean it isn't that difficult. But I panic. I panic because I think I'm going to sink and drown and die. I know that they were there to get me should I sink and drown, but I guess it's a trust/control thing. I did it on my own for a little while, but I couldn't keep myself afloat for long because I'd panic and kick my legs too hard and get tired and start sinking. Then I'd panic and flip out and Justin's all like "you're fine, calm down, blah blah," and it should have comforted me, but I get panic-y. I'm glad that he had the patience to watch me freak out for no reason and not wanna shove me under and leave me for dead. He's sweet like that. I think Ginny gave up on me early on. I don't blame her. She likes to swim too much to babysit me. I might learn to actually swim like a big girl one day.

And now on to more mowing grass. It takes it out of ya to sit on a mower for that long. I think I'm sweating out a fair few amount of calories though. Yay farmer's tan.

You ever wonder if the things you think about are really not important? Or is it all relative? I mean it's a big big world out there and what's important to me may not mean a thing to you. Actually I'm pretty sure that it won't matter that much to you. Whoever you are.

This question comes up because there's a lot of things going on these days that I really think should have my attention and they just don't. Not like I feel like they should anyway. It's not that I don't care about this election business in Iran. I care. I care that there's unnecessary violence and that people can't get in touch with their families and such. I care. It's just not the first thing on my mind.
I care that there's a big to-do about interest rates going up on credit cards for people that are actually paying their bill. As a person that actually pays her bill, I should care. My interests rates are through the fucking roof. But I don't spend a lot of time thinking about it.
New proposed health care system. I care. I don't have health insurance for the simple fact that I turned 22. But I'm not giving it much thought.

So what is it that's running through my brain instead? I think to most people, it's trivial things. I spent a lot of time today thinking about how people go about writing songs. I've read a lot of books. Autobiographies and rock journals of musicians and stuff. Many a different artist go about songwriting in different ways. Some are just phrases that turn into songs once in the recording studio. Some are poems that are turned into lyrics. Some are banged out in an hour and handed to the artist in the studio on sheet music that day. I've thought about that a lot today. I read in Reader's Digest that Kelly Clarkson wrote her first song at age 10. I called horseshit. I think the only reason I did is beause I couldn't do that at 10. Notorious B.I.G. never wrote his rhymes down. Everything came from his brain, out of his mouth and into the mic the day it was recorded, in one take. How do people do that? Not only "how do people do that," but how do those songs seem to move people to fucking tears? HOW? It's consumed me today and it's not the first time I've given it a lot of thought. But is it important? To me it kind of is. For the amount of music I consume on the daily, I think it would be weird if I never stopped to think about how it gets to me, even at least a little bit.

Most people probably think this trivial and I don't mind that they do. But I mean, do I really have to think about "important things," all the time? I feel like if I did, I would be consumed with worry ALL THE TIME. You can't take the world on your shoulders all the time. Yes there are important things going on in the world and there are things that we regular people can do about it, big or small. I also feel like you can only control your little corner of the world and trying to do otherwise is more of a pain than anything else. Am I being really naive? Is it the whole ignorance is bliss thing? Where I don't pay too much attention, therefore it doesn't worry me? The things I mentioned above that are "important?" They matter to me and some directly affect me. Let's take my student loans for example. I don't spend a lot of time thinking about them. I know they exist and that in 2 short years, I'll have to start paying them back and it'll take a long time and it won't be easy. But I don't worry about it. Is that so wrong? I don't think so but I could just be acting like a kid.

This is getting a little ramble-ish-y. Yes, I made that word up just now. I don't know, I just feel like I'm living in a little bliss bubble right now and that it isn't necessarily what I should be doing. I'm having a great time doing nothing right now. I don't really think the world is gonna come crashing down on me tomorrow, but it might. And I'm not worrying about it. If it happens, it happens. What does that mean? What the hell is wrong with me?

Life has been pretty...eh as of late. Not necessarily a bad eh, just eh. Summer without employment (thus far) has been pretty chill. I do a lot of cleaning and odd jobs around the house. I find little OCD projects to occupy my time. Like for example when my parents got married and got a VCR they taped pretty much every movie ever and we have them catalogued and there are hundreds of them. Over the years we've replaced some of them with DVDs. My project was to list all of our taped from TV VHS movies and cross off the ones we've purchased on DVD and then get rid of the ones we don't care to find on DVD. Yeah, it sounds lame but it's time consuming and it eases my sensibilities.

I did have a pretty sweet weekend though. On Friday I got to travel to the burg for a very weird movie and time with boyfriend and hughesy + girlfriend. It was fun. A nice change of pace. The next day, Justin came to the noke to see me and didn't get actually lost the entire way here. I don't count getting lost in my neighborhood as getting lost because everyone does it. Apparently my directions are less than stellar. So when he got here we played around the city the entire day. I took him to the mall (woo, exciting I know,) the star on Mill Mountain, and the farmer's market downtown. We got to experience really expensive homemade ice cream, the foodcourt, and being hustled by a real-live hustler. He lost ten bucks. Hagen lost 20. I lost none, because I'm broke as a joke. But the hustler man did tell me I had pretty eyes. He made me take my sunglasses off and then he told me to put them back on because I was mesmerizing. Yeah. It was silly.

Then in some way shape or form, I think the mob has something to do with it, we got to bowl two games for free in Salem. With free shoes and socks and stuff. Justin broke 100 for the first time in his bowling career and was ecstatic about it. It was 107, for the record. We ate at B-dubs, where Hagen played "Mrs. Robinson," on the juke box. That bastard. We saw The Hangover. Excellent movie. Very very funny. I recommend that you see it.

It was really nice to have him here for a day. His parents wouldn't let him stay over so it was only a day, but I had a pretty good time. Ok I had a really good time.

In the meantime I need money. I don't really have anything to pay for right now, but I will once I move in to wherever I'm moving in to. I also need to purchase text books. That reminds me, I need to email my advisor and sign up for classes.EEEEKKK! This grad school business is not fun thus far. I also have two presentation/workshop type things that I need to make up for RA training. I don't know anything yet and they want me to present to others. I'm getting thrown into a lot on July 31st that I don't think I'm ready for. Don't get me wrong, I don't back down from a challenge. But I'm just not used to going into something where I'm not already familiar. That's what she said.

We're shopping for mom's bday presents today. Tomorrow I will be in Lynchburg, taking Jamie to SOAR (where I want to be, damnit.) Hopefully I'll get to see some peeps before I return home that afternoon. This week should prove to be uneventful and full of birthdays.

Today my horoscope says:

"Dear Gemini is seeing the world from both sides now and this can give you the insight to achieve a balanced relationship. You've done the homework and so you are prepared and ready to meet life's challenges with a partner instead of alone. A Gemini always is happiest working with others."

I dig it.

I am pretty disappointed that I don't get to work SOAR this year. Why did I have to graduate? I am made to attend Lynchburg College. I'm really good at that job description. Now I am still attending LC for the next two years but it's not the same. I got my GA job and it has all these new responsibilities that I need to learn. I can't hang like I used to. I can still hang, it's just not the same.

There are some benefits though...
-no chapter meetings ever again!
-no 8:30am classes as a grad student
-of course the free tuition, room, board and the stipend

Those are some sweet perks.

For the summer I think I might have landed myself a job of sorts but in this forum everytime I say that I think I have a job I don't. So knock on wood with this one I guess. I put in an application at Honeytree (it's like daycare) yesterday. The woman asked me if I had my degree about 4 times (to which I answered yes), asked me when I"m available and if I liked children. That was it. She said she'd talk to her payroll person and get back to me. Awesome. The bad part? I don't think I'm the most qualified person to be handling other people's spawn for 9 hours everyday. But the seem to want to give me a job anyway. I just hope I can be suprisingly not around when diaper change time happens. No bueno. No bueno.

We're headed to Lynchburg today. I'm getting some of my crap so I can wear more than the items I brought to the beach and Jill's wedding (aka the same 4 shirts and pairs of pants.) Maybe I'll bring my computer, although there's really nowhere to put it. Should be fun.

And now, I just can't wait for Friday :)

Jill's wedding made me cry quite a bit.

I cried when we took pictures before the wedding.
I cried when she walked down the isle.
I cried when Matt put the ring on her finger.
I cried during the irish blessing.
I cried during the father/daughter dance.
I cried during the mother/son dance.

And then I stopped crying. There are pictures on Facebook. I looked like a giant stick of gum, but with really nice make up, great eyebrows, and hair that wouldn't move in a hurricane. It was good times. There was drama-rama in everyone else's lives but I was cool with pretty much everything. We danced like losers, Jill and Matt left the reception to bubbles and all of of screaming Don't Stop Believin, and I made it home to Roanoke relatively unscathed. All in all it was pretty sweet.

Today I cleaned my dad's car. Really nicely I might say. I mowed the lawn. Grilled out. Watched the Puff the Magic Dragon cartoon. Productive I know. I don't have a job, so I have to come up with creative ways to occupy my time until the magical job fairy puts some W2 forms and a schedule under my pillow. I'll let you know how that goes.

So I graduated college.

I then went to OBX for a week with my family. While there I dropped my phone in the toilet and the number 4 button doesn't work. I have to come up with creative ways to text people. Also while at the beach I accepted a graduate assistantship in the Office of Residence Life. That means I'm attending graduate school for free, with free housing, a stipend, and a meal plan. All free. I get a M.Ed for free. That's what's up.

After the beach Jamie and I traveled to the Coca Cola 600 for my birthday, again. It didn't happen however. It rained out, twice. We did more driving and playing Phase 10 then watching cars take left turns. It was still fun, but I don't want to go back to North Carolina ever again.

I am now back in Lynchburg. I did a brief stint at my parents house for a day an a half. I came back to the LBC yesterday to try and hang with Justin because I'm a big sap and I miss him and blah blah blah. I also kidnapped Palmer from work, went to the Poet with Hughesy, Hagen, and Jamie. Saw Forrest for a little while. I went to an 80s party last night with a bunch of staff members and GAs. These people are my friends now. I'm old. So old. But I had an awesome time and I'm sore from dancing and headache-y.

Today I'll be going to Gretna with Jamie to help prepare for Jill's wedding on Saturday. Today is going to be all prep stuff and making sure Jill isn't ripping her hair out by the roots. Tomorrow is rehearsal and rehearsal supper. Saturday is the wedding. The boyfriend is coming down for the rehearsal supper hopefully and all our friends (mostly) will be at the wedding on Saturday which should be awesome.

I then return to Roanoke on Saturday night. After that...no clue. No job, no prospects, a summer with no employment is no bueno.

For now, I'm worrying about the present as much as possible. Meaning, I'm going to watch Billy Madison now.

Life is prety good.

I'm done. No exams. Just chillen for senior week

Got the Senior Formal and Jill's bridal shower tomorrow.
Graduation crap on Thursday
Graduation crap on Friday
Graduation on Saturday and then leaving for OBX.

Currently, I'm just taking everything in. Packing my room, hanging with friends, spending time with a pretty sweet boyfriend. Life is good.

I haven't heard anything about grad assistant jobs yet. If they could get on that, that'd be amazing. Otherwise, I'm just gonna sit here and not worry about a thing. It's all going to work out, some way some how. And I'm ok with that.

Today was my last chapter meeting as an undergraduate in Tri Sigma.

Wow.

It's one of those things you just never thought would happen. We all got nice presents and stuff. Lots of letter and thank yous. I got a sigma clock and a photo album stock full of my favorite pictures ever. That made me so happy, that's one thing I've always really wanted. They did a slideshow of pictures of all of us, set to "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts, which is one of those songs we all associate with Sigma.

I didn't cry. I feel like I probably should have. I got a lot of really sweet letters and a lot of other people were moved to tears and normally I would have been. I cry over sentimental shit all the time. I just didn't cry. I felt bad because I didn't, like people thought that their sentiments didn't move me at all. That's not true. I guess it's just because I really haven't let this whole thing sink in and I probably should because it's coming up a lot faster than I'm willing to admit to myself.

I guess I'm just getting caught up in a lot of happy shit lately, that I keep pushing that stuff to the back of my mind without thinking about it. I've got good friends and we like having a good time all the time and my sorority sisters are kick ass. I don't want to leave any of it and thinking about leaving any of it will make me sad all day. So I don't think about it. And it's like I'm living in this little bliss bubble right now. That bubble is gonna burst when my mind finally registers that this is my last 2 weeks of school. Jesus Christ...

Today in my Communication Law and Ethics class my professor was not there. You usually know that something stupid is going to happen in class if the office assistant comes down with a piece of paper and a DVD case in her hands. We watched Shattered Glass.

I hate that movie. Don't get me wrong. I can understand it's educational purpose for journalism students. It's about (for those of you fortunate folks who have never seen it,) a writer for The New Republic magazine that fabricates stories.

The message? "Don't make shit up, you'll get caught. Utilize journalistic integrity."

I've seen this movie in 5 seperate communication classes in my career. Damn it. I spent the entire class coming up with ways to exit the room should a fire occur. It's that bad.

If you're not going to be in class for a week, don't make us suffer. Just cancel class. Don't make us sit through a movie that you KNOW as seniors in the comm major, we've seen in at least one class before. It's just cruel.

My room is really messy. Like I have no path to walk to my bed. It's a good thing I live by myself.

I have 30 graduation announcements that need to be sent out and they're sitting on my floor.

I'm graduating very soon (yes Travis, I brought it up again,) and I have no definite plans of where I'll be in a month.

As usual I have no money.

I have this weird pain at the base of my head that makes me feel like right now is kinda like the start of an episode of House.

It's raining outside.









But honestly? My life is so good right now. :)

I'm not sure when this happened, but I'm a 2 year old.

I throw fits like a 2 year old when I don't get my way.

I'm a bad sport when I lose, like a 2 year old.

I'm a toddler. That's right. A toddler that's about to graduate college with absolutely no honors.

Let's talk about something for a second.
I'm awake before I normally would be on a Thursday. It's 10:15am. I got up at 8:50am. I don't have class until 1pm. You do the math.

And because I would normally be asleep right now, I'm extra annoyed about the amount of noise outside my window. They are mowing and trimming and weedeating the WET grass outside my house. I don't know how much you fair readers know about lawn care, but I'll tell you, that mowing wet grass is NOT THE WAY TO GO! It's not. And they don't bag it, which for lawns this small, pisses me off but what can ya do. I can let that one go. But mowing wet grass? Seriously. And doing it in the morning. When I would normally be asleep and then woken up and pissed off. I realize that I haven't actually been ripped from my sleep but I'm still a little angry for the me that should be asleep right now.

Today I have a few things to do:

-Get my drag show together (It's Saturday at 10pm in the Ballroom, be there)
That includes: Calling my performers, getting tables and lighting and decorations and prizes, making a set list, getting contracts signed

-Go to class today

-Take the Gay?Fine By Me picture at 6pm

-Leadership Awards at 7pm

-Write a paper. This paper should be fun. I have to break a social norm and write about people's reactions to it. I could dress inappropriately for class, stare at the back of an elevator, hug people I don't know. I'm not sure what I'm going to do for this yet. I might just not wear a bra all day.

-Shower. That should be at the top of the list I think.

300 to 500 words on why I want to go to grad school shouldn't be that difficult, should it? I don't think that the topic itself is difficult, but sitting down and writing it seems likes the most soul-consuming thing I'll ever do. I just can't. I sit down, I type in the heading, save it and nothing. Just can't.

Also, I've been watching old seasons of House, MD. I wanted to catch up. I'm on the last episode of season 3 right now. That's all I've got. What am I going to do?!

And in case we haven't been keeping count, ladies and gentlemen, 32 days till graduation.